Wednesday, February 23, 2011

You Can't Win If You Don't Enter

Next Tuesday is the deadline for the James Jones Literary Society First Novel Fellowship and I have to submit the first 50 pages and a one to two page outline of my book to be eligible for the $10K prize they give annually for a work-in-progress of fiction by a U.S. writer who has not yet published a novel.

One of my other goals for this year (besides finishing the book) is to raise $12,500 for the book launch early next year. That money would go to things like creating the website, printing limited edition copies of the book and covering the costs of a premiere party.

Winning would bring me closer to my dream... but of course you can't win if you don't enter.

So what's holding me back from entering?

First, I'm slow. I'm the tortoise. I always get there, but can I get there by Tuesday????? My two page outline is currently at 5-1/2 pages and I've only covered six out of twenty chapters. Yikes! Plus, I have to write a missing but very important chapter!

Second, I'm sick. I came down with shingles from stress at work. The company I work for just came out of Chapter 11 reorganization and it seems like every week there's another round of layoffs.

Third, I have other pressing obligations. I have an important assignment at work so I can't possibly call in sick tomorrow. Also, my son's financial aid forms for his college financial aid are also due March 1st -- which means I have to finish my taxes by then too. Good grief!

Do you think I can finish -- on time?

I didn't have time this week to snap a picture for you, so I decided to use this one. When I first started writing this post I didn't know how the picture would figure in. I took it a few days ago. Over the holiday weekend, I noticed a hummingbird darting back and forth between our porch and wherever it is hummingbirds come from. She seemed very interested in my potted Norfolk pine. When I got up close I realized why -- she was building a nest in it! How lucky is that??!!

Do you think she will come back and finish it?

Tuesday, February 15, 2011

Afraid to Start


The topic for the first week’s post was easy. It came to me in a flash. It came before I even started blogging. I named it: AFRAID TO START.

This is how it went in my head:

You need to learn how to blog if you are going to self publish and promote your book. The problem is you don’t have time to blog. You are not ready. You can’t possibly blog about the book before you are finished writing it and blogging about something else will take up too much time and distract you from the book. Okay so forget about writing a blog just take pictures. That’s easy. No, The Sartorialist can do it but you suck. Your camera sucks too and you’re out of control on wordpress. You can’t even figure out how to navigate the dashboard. You could try vimeo except you’re not even sure what that is. Better be careful. Don’t get carried away. Don’t get too complicated. You have no time, remember. You can’t possibly do this.

All this was going through my head, when I remembered Srinivas Rao’s interview of Lisa Hickey (goodmenproject.com) on BlogcastFM. They were talking about getting started on your blog and I think it was Srini said, “You won’t be very good at first – the key is to just do it. “

That’s when I decided I had to do it.

I had to just start.

SO I DID!

And how do you like my picture for AFRAID TO START?

I was on my way to the pool and I thought, I’ll ask the lifeguard to take a snapshot of me diving in off the block. Great image for the point I want to get across, right? Except when I got there I realized that they don’t have blocks at the Culver Y! Plus, by the time I finished my workout, lap swim was over and a gang of kids jumped in with their beach balls and flotation devices! My perfect idea ruined! But I had to get something, some kind of shot. So as I was leaving, I snapped this picture. Kids having fun.

Thursday, February 10, 2011

Bringing it to Light

This month’s assignment for my mastermind group (firstfridaymasterminds.com) is to create a Facebook Page and (for extra credit) to start a blog to promote the service/product I am developing in the group.

My service is to help other women and the product is The Red Coat, an illustrated fairytale for women that I have been working on for 15 years. I know, right? That's a long time! Several months ago we set goals in the group and one of mine was to finish The Red Coat by December 31, 2011. That's this year!

In the past, things always got in the way of me finishing anything - demands of motherhood, tough jobs, difficult bosses, and confusion about the men in my life - but mostly it was me and my lack of faith in myself. But now I feel ready. I feel like I can do it! I learned a lot about myself writing the book and I can't wait to show it to you. But of course, there's always that fear: what if it's no good? What if it's not right? What if it's not exactly...perfect?

I decided a great blog topic for me (one that supports rather than distracts me from my goal) would be to write about the fear and resistance that comes up as I near the completion date.

Here are 5 things I want this blog to do:

  1. Be simple. I want to be understood.
  2. Be easy. I have enough on my hands trying to make my deadline.
  3. Create awareness. I want to identify the fears that holds me back.
  4. Create movement. I will come up with actions to address them.
  5. Be interesting. I'll follow through and write about what happens!
In the coming week, I'll be taking note of moments I start to lose my way, making excuses, falling into confusion, becoming afraid. I'm not sure fear will go away, but bringing it to light, coming up with a plan and taking action will certainly do one thing for me -- I expect I'm going to have an interesting week!

If there is something in the way of your happiness, a dream that you keep putting off, I encourage you to try it this week too!